Helping us See: The Light Christian Community Can Be

Background

A recurring theme in my life this semester has been community, and how much of a need it absolutely vital to the Christian walk. About a month ago, I went on a weekend retreat with my college ministry group. The last night some people had gone off to the basketball courts to play a game while others were starting to get settled in for the night. One of my friends was really not feeling good so I had stayed behind with her when the game group departed. When she called it a night, I went in search of the game group. 

They they weren’t where they said they were going to be, so I set off in search of them. I thought I saw some flashlights in the woods across the lake so I decided to cross the bridge and search for my friends. Now let me set the scene for you. The sky is overcast and completely blocking out the light from the moon and stars. I have no illumination at all except from the little flashlight app on my iPhone. I walked just a little ways into the woods, always staying on the trail that keeps the lake in view, and after walking just a little ways, not wanting to get lost, I decided to turn back. 

I reached the point where I was just positive the bridge was, but it was so dark that I couldn’t see it with just my little bit of light. I questioned myself, knowing I have a terrible sense of direction. Had I passed the bridge? Had I not gone far enough? But, being positive that I was in the right place I slowly walked towards the lake and when I got incredibly close, saw the bridge.
 

The Light of Christian Community
God showed me that night that trying to follow Christ on your own was like me trying to find a bridge- in the woods- in complete darkness- with a tiny little light. I’m a believer. The love and light of Christ is in me. Those in darkness can see light, no matter how small. But trying to find your way through life on your own, with just my your own little light is so difficult. It is far easier to see when you are with a group of people who love God and each have the light of his love shining in and through them. 

If I had been with others with their own lights in those woods I would have been able to see the land bridge- no problem. But on my own, I just couldn’t find my way. So I just want to encourage you, to find a group of believers and shine together.

How has Christian community helped you? Share in the comments below.

*first posted on 11/18/12 and updated on 1/1/19

The Purpose of Sorrow: Healing in the Sadness

Background
I spent much of my senior year of high school in a funk. It came and went, but whenever I was in the midst of sadville I sincerely believed I was letting God and everyone else down. During my first semester of college, God came in and overhauled my life and addressed the underlying causes of the funk. However, whenever I felt sad, I still believed I was letting God and everyone else down.

God had blessed me with a joyful heart. For as long as I could remember I made seeming cheery my identity. I was the happy girl, even when I was miserable. If I ever cried I was alone, until God came in and started softening my heart to myself and others. 

Being able to cry in front of those that truly care about me has been such a blessing in my life. Always holding all of that emotion in made me a ticking-time-bomb. I can remember several times where something real little just made me go off because it was the straw that broke the camel’s back. That isn’t good for anyone!

The purpose of sorrow and mourning
In my first semester of college I was still making happiness my identity. I always felt like it was my job to be happy no matter what. Until one day when God led me to two passages in Ecclesiastes:

Sorrow is better than laughter, 
For by a sad countenance the heart is made better. 
Ecclesiastes 7:3, NKJV

(You might remember this one from the movie Footloose.)
To everything there is a season,
A time for every purpose under heaven...
A time to weep,
And a time to laugh;
A time to mourn,
And a time to dance.
Ecclesiastes 3:1,4 NKJV

I am also thankful for the knowledge that we are comforted in the midst of our sorrows and can in turn be of comfort to others.

2 Corinthians 1:3-4 (NIV) tells us:
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.

Through these verses I came to understand that sorrow and mourning is essential for healing. God uses sorrow just like every other part of our lives. So it is okay to be sad. In this time look to Jesus and reach out for support. You might find comfort in speaking to a friend, a leader in your church, or a counselor.

What have you learned during times of sorrow?
How have you been able to use the hard times to help others?
Share in the comments below.

Related songs
1. Blessings by Laura Story
2. The Reason for the World by Matthew West
3. In the Middle by Jimmy Needham
4. All This Time by Britt Nicole
5. Center of It by Chris August

Related video
1. Cards You've Been Dealt by the SkitGuys

*This was originally published on 8/24/12 and was updated on 1/1/19

Self-esteem & Finding Worth: By Realizing Who You Are

 

On Struggling With Self-Esteem and Pride
I have struggled with self-esteem for as long as I can remember. I am writing this because I know many of you also struggle. When I am not fighting self-esteem, I'm usually fighting pride. Why self-esteem and pride? They seem opposite but are absolutely linked. When I was a child I began this self-destructive system of thinking to combat my insecurities. I would attempt to inflate myself by comparing myself to others. Some comparisons would inflate my pride. Others would chip away at my self-esteem.

My self-esteem hit an all-time low in junior high, when I was a child of God but had stopped trying to move forward in our relationship. There is no stationary with God! Like a river, if you think you are just sitting there you are actually moving farther away. Junior high, a difficult for anyone: with all the hormonal changes, drama, and the changes in peer relationships. Going through all that without seeking the love and guidance of my savior left me in dire straits. So when I finally began walking with God again my self-worth was in the gutter. That is when I wrote this poem: 

A Poem About My Struggle With Self-esteem
Not Just Another Frog
May 21, 2009

Life is empty.  
The world is gray.
I’m all alone at the end of the day.
I’ve been running down a bleak path,  
until my strength just will not come back.

I am filthy,
an utter mess.
The world has forsaken me.
I can feel no less.

Then you came and took my hand,
washed away the grime,
and willed me to stand.

Now maybe I’m crazy,

otherwise I’ve gone insane.
Yet I need to just stand here and scream your name.
The colors are changing;
the world is no longer the same.
Songs have meaning that I previously could not explain.

You’re the only one who has cared enough to take my hand and say,  
Darling you are beautiful in every way.

When others let me down,
then turn away and forget.
You’re there waiting to hold me,
you never forget.
When words come from people with snake-like tongues,
they can tear me down,
for many a wound they have stung.

But you’ll lift me up with you scarred hands and say,
“My child, you don’t believe a word.
They truly are blind,
if they cannot see.
You are wonderful,
so come walk with me.”

Everyday when people fail to know the real me,
I can stand among them.
In spite of their wrong,
for I am a Princess
and my Prince is strong.

Inspired by:           

But God demonstrates his own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us (Romans 5:8, NIV).

Charm is deceitful and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised. (Proverbs 31:30, NIV).

How I Have Battled for Self-esteem
To this day, I face a daily battle to see myself the way God sees me, and to love myself in a humble way. According to The Purpose Driven Life: What on Earth am I here for?, "Humility isn't thinking less of yourself, it's thinking of yourself less." Some days are easier than others but by God's grace he is moving in my life, and showing me that I am fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14).

Jesus would not have become human to be mocked, betrayed, abandoned, beaten, and murdered for someone who is worthless. Instead, he laid down his life because he loves us. It is in our relationship with him that we find worth and true humility.

If you are wrapped up in pride or are lacking in self-worth look to the cross. There you find humility. Yes it will be difficult! But we serve The Prince of Peace, King of Kings, and Lord of Lords. And we are children of God and our Prince IS STRONG!

 Additional material dealing with the self-worth :

Psalm 139

Videos:

1. The Chisel Skit: The Skit Guys 
2. A Snoodle’s Tale From Veggie Tales 
3. Lifehouse Everything Skit

Songs:

1. Help Me Believe: Donna Stuart  
2. Beloved & House of Mirrors: Tenth Avenue North 
3. More Beautiful You: Johnny Diaz 
4. Who Says: Selena Gomez & the Scene
5. Someone Worth Dying For: MIKESCHAIR  
6. Gold: Britt Nicole 
7. Firework: Katy Perry                                                                             
   
   
   What are songs or stories that remind you of your worth? Share in the comments below.

*Originally published on 7/25/12 and updated on 12/29/2018 

Sons not Sims: Making Decisions In God's Will

 

We were created to be sons (children) of God not Sims. Sims is a popular video game where you create and control a community and its inhabitants, who are known as Sims. The Sims are completely helpless. You have to tell them to do everything, right down to using the bathroom, and if you leave them alone too long they relieve themselves all over the floor. A Sim is the opposite of who we were created to be. We are children who are taught by the Father how to live, not Sims who are controlled and have no decision making abilities.

 
The Field of God's Will
I used to think of God’s will as a narrow little path that if you stepped off you were out of God’s will. Until God’s will was described to me using the metaphor of a field. God puts us in this field and tells us to go and do as we see fit for as long as we stay within the boundaries of the field. These boundaries being His law and who He created us to be. Coming to understand this showed me that His will allows for some freedom of choice. So much worry was taken off of my shoulders! I had been plagued with fears and questions of, I want to do this but what if it’s not in God’s will? Now I am not saying that God throws us into the world with no direction, for he tells us, “If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you(James 1:5, NIV).” Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths (Proverbs 3:5-6, ESV).”

We May Have Some Direction
God tells us in these verses that if we seek him, he will give us understanding and if we trust him, he will make our paths straight. I am a firm believer that sometimes God puts ideas into our heads. I will go and visit someone off-the-wall and they will tell me my visit was an answer to prayer. I have also had people come and speak with me and this has been an answer to my prayers. Later, they shared with me they felt that God had wanted them to come and speak to me.

Sometimes God gives us choices in life and all possible decisions are of his will. So if you are faced with a choice and are praying about it, digging into the word about it, and have asked fellow believers what they think about your decision and there is no clear answer then either decision that you make could be in the will of God.

The Gift of Making Decisions
The way I picture this gift of decision making that God has given us is, when we are born we are completely reliant on our parents to make all of our decisions for us. As we grow our parents teach us and slowly allow us to use what we have learned to make informed decisions on our own. Parents are not expected to tell their kids to not stick your finger in the electric outlet every day for their whole lives.

In the same way God teaches us how to live. When we are young Christians, i.e. children in the faith, sometimes he outright shows us what to do. However, as we grow we are expected to take what he has taught us and use it to make wise decisions. Paul in 1 Corinthians 3:1-2 spoke of how Paul was feeding the Corinthians milk instead of solid food. Which was a metaphor for how he was teaching the Corinthians basic spiritual truths when they were spiritually old enough to be learning and exploring deeper spiritual truths. We are called to deeper growth in Christ where we will eat solid food and have the knowledge to make biblically based decisions.

How have you received direction from God?
What have you done when God's direction was unclear? 
Share in the comments below.

 
*originally posted on 7/6/12 and updated on 12/29/2018

God fulfills every need: God in Psychology (Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs Model)

We learn about God through creation. 

By learning more about his creation, we learn more about the creator. 

What is the Hierarchy of Needs Model
For an introductory psychology course, I wrote about Abraham Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs Model of motivation and realized God fits into every step of the pyramid. For those of you not familiar with Maslow's Model, it forms a pyramid and it lists three categories with five subcategories of needs that humans have. The bottom starts with basic needs, i.e. physiological needs, what our bodies must have to keep living, and safety needs. Next comes psychological needs, i.e. the need for love and belonging and the need for accomplishment and esteem. Lastly, is the need for self-fulfillment or self-actualization (Maslow, 1943).

Physiological Needs
God fulfills our physiological needs,“He himself gives life and breath to everything, and he satisfies every need (Acts 17:25, NLT)."

He fulfills our safety and security needs:
“Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the LORD, He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust. Surely he will save you from the fowler’s snare and from the deadly pestilence. He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart. You will not fear the terror of night, nor the arrow that flies by day, nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness, nor the plague that destroys at midday. A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you (Psalm 91:1-7, NIV)."

Psychological Needs
He is the fulfillment of our love needs because, “God is love (1 John 4:8, NIV)."

If we will trust Him with our lives we are given the right to become children of God, so we belong. “See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are (1 John 3:1, NIV)!"

In God’s eyes we have more worth and esteem than we could ever realize!

“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. How precious to me are your thoughts, God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand— when I awake, I am still with you (Psalm 139:13-18, NIV)."

He had our days planned out for us before we were even born and His works are wonderful and we are His works, therefore, we are wonderful!

Self-fulfillment Needs 
Nothing could be more self-actualizing than being the person God created you to be. For God in His mercy allows trials in life to “refine us like silver (Psalm 66:10, NIV),” that we might gain perseverance, so that we can “let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything (James 1:4).”

How has our Creator met your needs?
What are some of your favorite verses about God meeting our needs? 
Share in the comments below.

Reference

Maslow, A. (1943). A Theory of Human Motivation. Psychological Review, 50(4), pp. 370-396.

*Originally posted on 6/20/12 and was further edited on 12/29/18